Not too long ago I was in Walmart...before I gave up shopping at Walmart. In the check out line a mother was threatening her small child with a spanking when they got home. He had been asking for candy...too many times apparently and the mother was sick of hearing it. The boy started crying and the mother said that the kid "deserved a spanking." Deserved a spanking. Does any child deserve a spanking? If your spouse ticks you off do you hit them? Your sibling? Your friend? Your co-worker? WHY...please tell me why it's ok to hit your child who is small and helpless?
I was reading a column about spanking on a parenting website recently...a mom wrote in asking if she'd go to jail for hitting her kid. This mother was more worried about going to jail than hurting her child. There is something really wrong here.
Did you also know that corporal punishment is legal in 29 states?? WHAT?? I'm sorry, but again...WHY??
Years ago I picked up a copy of Dr. Sears' Discipline book. I was a big fan of his Baby book and the Discipline book resonated with me. Dr. Sears tells us to not use the Bible as an excuse to spank. The phrase "Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child" is not even in the Bible.....somewhere along the line this verse..."He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." Prov. 13:24....was turned into a green light for spanking.
Studies have shown that children who are spanked don't remember what they did to receive the punishment..they only remember the spanking. So, is this an effective way to discipline?
There is a better way to discipline our children. Plain ol' common sense tells us this is not the way....
Hear hear! Couldn't have said it better myself!
ReplyDeleteFirst, love your header.
ReplyDeleteSecond, you know I couldn't agree with you more. I wrote very strongly about my anti-spanking feelings after coming across a popular (uck!) Christian book that promoted it...it was sickening to me. Spanking babies! Spanking tilll the child "submits". It is SO disgusting to me. I think the more moms who DON'T spank who speak out, will empower moms who are on the fence, or feel pressure from relatives, friends or their church. I got so many defensive and hate filled comments when I wrote that post, but I also got so many neat letters that basically said, "I always felt the same way...that it wasn't effective and that in my gut, I knew it was wrong. I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels this way."
It always shocks me that in this day and age, it is acceptable to physically hurt a child to make them do what you want, and few see the idiocy in that.
I can go on and on...
thank you for speaking up!
(And I adore Dr. Sears too!)
I could not agree with both you, & Sarah above, more! How could you possibly consider physically controlling your child, by way of spanking-which is just plain hitting if it is adult to adult- a natural & loving way to raise a child? It astounds me that some parents feel that spanking is their 'right'- wuy does society frown on teen violence yet turn a blind eye in many situations to what i would term 'violence against children'.
ReplyDeleteIf you get a moment could you give me your thoughts on my post from monday , on raising children with freedom, yet boundaries...I know you will have a worthy & wonderful opinion!
Melissa x
http://misssewandso.blogspot.com
love, love, love, the picture! you captured one of those everyday moments that are so amazing!
ReplyDelete