Wednesday, October 27, 2010

What I Believe

"In all my time and effort spent researching the best ways to mother, I have come full circle to realize that in almost all cases, the best choices for the health of children and mothers are the ones you would make if stranded on a deserted island and forced to follow your instincts. Trust birth. Breastfeed. Keep your baby whole. Sleep by your baby. Wear your baby. Communicate with your baby. Listen and respond to your baby's cues and cries." ~ Jennifer Coias

A friend just sent me this quote and I have read it and re-read it a million times. I think I might print it out and hang it up. To me, these words affirm my beliefs in mothering.
As I am still on my retreat high, thoughts of the weekend have been running through my head. The conversations I had with other mothers truly validated my convictions and boy does that make you feel good.  To find someone else out there that thinks like you! I'm not alone! I'm not "weird" because I'm still nursing, or that we sleep with our baby. Because for years I felt like that. I was stranded on a deserted island. And then about 12 years ago I found someone who mothered like me. It was through a natural parenting website and from there we started emailing and became friends. We don't email really anymore..instead follow each others blogs . She helped me realize that how I was parenting was not just was right.
I so strongly believe that mothers and their babies need to bond. On every level. Physically, your body reacts the minute after that baby is born and is almost demanding you to nurse him. Emotionally, you are overcome with love and affection for this new life that you have created. Spritually, you are thankful for the gift that God has given you. Mentally, you are preparing yourself for the job that is now entrusted to you. 
Why do we fight this? Why do we disconnect ourselves from our babies too quickly? For a career that quite possibly could wait a few years? For a good nights sleep? For a clean house? I'm not saying those things aren't important. But, are they as important as the bond we're establishing that will carry them through life?
You know when you believe in something so wholeheartedly and you just want to share it with the world? Well, that's what I'm doing. Just sharing what I believe.


  1. I believe everyone should share what they believe in wholeheartedly.
    Well said!
    Your family is blessed because you are right where you are supposed to be!

  2. Oh my, Pam, I miss emailing with you. You have always been an inspiration to me. I love what you wrote. I love people that share what they believe. Honest people are people that I respect. Our world has so many people that are afraid to stand up for things. Especially if what they are standing up for is in the minority. You have never been like that. I love you and I miss you. God bless you and your very lucky kids. :)

  3. Sing it sister! This is the best thing I've read in such a long time. If I'm honest with myself, I still feel a little as if I'm on that deserted island, but now there's a plane that can take me off any time I wish and bring me to you (and all of the other POW friends from this past weekend). ~ Suzanne

  4. Thanks for a little perspective check. My life isn't so much finding time for the baby as it is feeling like I'm present and participating in my kids' lives on a level that I should be. Like playing with them instead of just living with them and bossing them around.
    Whew. This mothering thing is hard. You think you've got it, then it changes.

  5. Love this! I sure could have used it about 12 years ago! Love hearing what others believe :)

  6. I love passionate people and I especially love passionate mothers!
    I love and agree with everything you said. And I love that you put it out there, to inspire others.
    Wonderful quote, I think I need to print that one too.
    Enjoy the night

  7. You are amazing. Our beliefs are very different but I still think you are amazing! :)

  8. Pam, reading this makes me think we should have lived near each other all these years!!! It is such a blessing that we have reconnected on so many levels.Thanks so much for sharing what's on your's beautiful!

  9. I love your need to have these deep convictions. I had many of these beliefs as a young mother, but I needed more balance. It's what worked for me. Continue to follow your heart Pam and hold tight to your beliefs!

  10. I so wish mine wouldn't disconnect with me so quickly. I'm never ready for them to take off walking away, get distracted from nursing, want to be put down when I just want the squeeze them a moment longer. I worry at times that maybe I'm squashing their independence by try to hold them so close to me. I'm glad there are mom's who feel as I do.